Saturday, 30 December 2017

QA#1- Wants to marry him to prevent zinah


I want to know what is the consequence ofan adultdaughter if she want to convince her parents for early marriage in terms to end her haram love relationship. To make the things halal
And parents think it as arguments . By no way they are convinced.
In this case do the daughter treat as disobedient of parents in Islam.??


Walaykum Assalaam

everything should be done in the right time using the right means. Be it an engineering degree or a marriage celebration. Everything in this world has its own set of rules and protocols to be followed. Inside govt administration as well as islamic shari`ah

keeping this is mind, it is imperative that while marriage can be done early yet early marriage is not always the solution to prevent onself from zinah. Imagine a situation where a child wants to protect himself from the fitnah of intermingling with the opp. sex so instead of going to school and eventually gaining experience in a working office, he insists on his parents to DIRECTLY open a customised business environment for him without him having to go to school or gaining experience in any actual office. 

we all can easily relate how ridiculous his demand is , isn't it? Likewise, early marriage is not always the solution to prevent zinah or fitnah. Sometimes a muslim has to be wise enough to see the situation around him/her. such as for e.g. 

1) if she is of the right age - both biologically as well as mentally

2) if she is mature enough to start a family and know the baggage that comes with it in terms of responsibility  

The messenger of Allah sallalahu `alayhi wa sallam said: a man is the guardian of his family and is responsible for his subjects, a woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and of his children and is responsible for them [Ref: Sahih Muslim, Book 20, Number 4496]

with responsibility comes consequences and questioning 

The prophet sallalahu `alayhi wa sallam said: "There is no person to whom Allaah has given people to take care of, and he fails to take care of them properly, but he will not smell the fragrance of Paradise." (Saheeh Bukhari no. 6731; Saheeh Muslim, no. 142)

3) is the male adult and sane enough to marry . Is he of honourable character and family background? 

the parents of a girl especially need to be very careful about this because when they hand over their daughter in alliance, they are handing over the rest of her and her children's life to this one man. 

4) is he settled and capable enough both in terms of physical capability as well as financial capability - of supporting their daughter? 

The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “It is sufficient sin for a man to neglect his dependants.” [Narrated by Abu Dawood; classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani]

It was reported that Wahb said: “A freed slave of ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr said to him, ‘I want to go and spend this month there in Jerusalem.’ He said, ‘Have you left enough for your family to live on during this month?’ He said, ‘No.’ He said, ‘Then go back to your family and leave them what they need, for I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) saying: It is enough sin for a man not to give food to the one whom he is supposed to feed.”’

[Ref: Reported by Ahmad, 2/160 or 6664; Abu Dawood, 1692]

and many other factors that needs to be seen before one pursues the dream of marriage. Not all of them can be enlisted here as they vary from culture to culture and family to family. 

Finally coming down to the specifics of your question:

Yes a daughter, if her parents find it unfitting of her to marry now either due to her young age, or educational reasons or the male being incapable or indecent as per their analysis then rebelling against the parents is a sin. And engaging in an illicit relationship is also a sin against allah. Both disobedience to parents as well as Allah is a major sin

The prophet (sallalahu `alayhi wa sallam) said Allah may forgive whatsoever sins (one commits) among the (various types of ) sins except disobedience (disloyalty, ungratefulness) towards the parents. Rather he inflicts the punishment (for it) in this world (itself) before (the disobedient child’s) death

[Ref: Mustadrak Al-Haakim, Mishkat al-Masaabeh (4945) and elsewhere, da`eef] 

Some children even dare run away from their home breaking ties of kinship

The Messenger of Allaah , said: “There is no sin more deserving of having its punishment hastened in this world, in addition to what is reserved in the Hereafter for the one who does it, than transgression and cutting ties of kinship.” 

[Ref: Abu Daawood and others - Al-Albaani graded it Saheeh (sound)]

However if she has reached of proper age and both she and the male meet the requirements and yet parents object due to non-genuine reasons such as tribalism, casteism, basing their decision on mere hear-say rumours etc then she should try her best to sit and talk to them, help them understand that the time has come and how marrying will safeguard her religion as well as dunya. If needed, even involve other elder members of her family or friends who can be of assistance. if all the elders of her family agree on her marrying yet her parents are persistence due to a non genuine reason then she can ask her uncle or grandfather to intervene and become the wali for marriage.  

Note: non-genuine reason cannot be according to what some teenager thinks. It has to be non-genuine in the light of Islam and other elders.

The Messenger of Allah (sallalahu `alayhi wa sallam) said : Blessings are with your elders 

[Ref: Hadeeth reported by Abu Nu’aym, Al-Haakim vol.1 pg.62 ]

and continuously seek help of Allah via istikhara. Maybe it may be that he/she is not the right choice for you even though your hearts assume otherwise and that Allah has decreed another partner for you for maybe he/she may be better suited to you 

"And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know.” (AI-Baqarah, 2:216) 

Does He Who created not know, while He is The Subtle, The Acquainted? [Quran 67:14]

The Prophet (sallalahu `alayhi wa sallam ) said " ....Allah's decisions are the right ones and His conditions are the strong ones (firmer)... 

[Ref: Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 3, Book 34, Hadith 377]

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