We sent not an Apostle, but to be obeyed, in accordance with the Will of Allaah. [QURAN : SURAH AL NISA 4:64]
`Imraan bin Husain narrated that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “There is no obedience to anyone while in disobedience to Allaah.” [Musnad Ahmad (5/66) and Shaikh al-Albaanee said in al-Saheehah (179): It is Saheeh as per the condition of Muslim.]
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said : “THERE SHOULD BE NO OBEDIENCE TO A CREATED BEING IF IT INVOLVES DISOBEDIENCE TO THE CREATOR.”
(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Book on expeditions, no. 4340; Sahih Muslim, Book on rulership, no. 1840; Sunan Al-Nasa'y, Book on Al-Bay'ah, no. 4205; Sunan Abu Dawud, Book on Jihad, no. 2625; and Musnad Ahmad ibn Hanbal, vol. 1, p. 131.)
Narrated Ibn `Umar: The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “It is obligatory for one to listen to and obey (the ruler's orders) unless these orders involve disobedience (to Allaah); but if an act of disobedience (to Allaah) is imposed, he should not listen to or obey it.”
[Saheeh al-Bukhaaree]
The prophet (s.a.w) also said "It is obligatory for a muslim to listen and obey (the appointed authority) whether they like it or not, except when they are ordered to do a sinful thing; in such a case, there is no obligation to listen or to obey."
[Al-Bukhari, Book on judgments, no. 7144; Muslim, Book on rulership, no. 1839; Al-Tirmidhy, Book on Jihad, no. 1707; Al-Nasa'y, Book on Al-Bay'ah, no. 4206; Abu Dawud, Book on Jihad, no. 2626; Ibn Majah, Book on Jihad, no. 2864; and Ahmad, Musnad, vol. 2, p. 142]
Narrated `Alee bin Abu Taalib: The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم sent a Sariyyah (an army unit) under the command of a man from the Ansaar and ordered the soldiers to obey him. He (i.e. the commander) became angry (for some reason) and said, “Didn't the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم order you to obey me!” They replied, “Yes.” He said, “Collect fire-wood for me.” So they collected it. He said, “Make a fire.” When they made it, he said, “Enter it (i.e. the fire).” So they intended to do that and started holding each other and saying, “We run towards (i.e. take refuge with) the Prophet from the fire.” They kept on saying that till the fire was extinguished and the anger of the commander abated. When that news reached the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he said, “If they had entered it (i.e. the fire), they would not have come out of it till the Day of Resurrection. Obedience (to somebody) is required when he enjoins what is good.”[Saheeh al-Bukhaaree and Muslim]
Narrated `Alee: The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم sent an army and appointed some man their commander. The man made a fire and then said (to the soldiers), “Enter it.” Some of them intended to enter it while some others said, “We have run away from it (i.e., embraced Islam to save ourselves from the 'fire).” They mentioned that to the Prophet, and he said about people who had intended to enter the fire. “If they had entered it, they would have remained in it till the Day of Resurrection.” Then he said to others, “No obedience for evil deeds, obedience is required only in what is good.” [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree]
REGARDING THOSE WHO ARE BEING FORCED TO DISOBEY ISLAM BECAUSE OF THEIR PARENTS:
We have enJoined on man kindness to parents: but if They (either of them) strive (to force) thee to Join with Me anything of which thou hast no knowledge. obey Them not.Ye have (all) to return to Me, and I will tell You ~the truth) of all that ye did." [Quran Sooratul- Ankaboot ( 29 ): 8]
"Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: To me is (thy final) Goal.But if they strive to make thee Join in worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not; Yet bear them company in this llfe with Justice (and consideration), and follow the way of those who turn to Me: In the end the return of you all is to Me. "[Soorah Luqmaan (31)]
Remember : The prophet (s.a.w) sent back a man who came for one of the best deeds in the sight of Allah - i.e for Jihad ! against the will of his parents. The prophet (s.a.w) sent him back saying, go serve your parents and that will be your Jihad.
Conclusion: Obey your parents except in serious issues like, Hijab, Prayer, Shirq, etc etc
REGARDING WOMEN WHO ARE BEING FORCED TO OBEY THEIR HUSBAND OR FAMILY IN WRONG-DOINGS :
Shaykh al-Fawzaan (may Allah preserve him) said:
Women are enjoined to obey Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, and they are enjoined to obey their husbands and parents, within the framework of obedience to Allah.
But if obeying a person such as one’s father or husband involves disobedience of the Creator, this is not permissible, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Obedience is only in that which is right and proper)” (narrated by al-Bukhaari) and he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience to the Creator” (narrated by Ahmad).
Al-Muntaqa min Fataawa al-Shaykh al-Fawzaan, 1/265, 266, Question no. 161
Abu Bakr radhiallahu `anhu, after becoming the khalifah gave a sermon wherein he proclaimed openly : " As long as i obey the commandments of Allah, then (upon you is to) obey me , but when i disobey Allah and his messenger , then you are not obliged to obey me.
[Ref: Seerat Ibn Hishaam, 4/311 ; Saheeh by Hafidh Zubayr `Ali Zaee]
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